Today Prime Minister Stephen Harper appointed a new federal cabinet. A few key Ministers were shuffled around while several new MPs were added to the cabinet, which is larger in size than the previous one. Some of the appoints are, in my opinion, downright perplexing. What follows is a list of the most ironic and counter-intuitive cabinet appointments made today.

• Jason “Overheated Sikhs Using the Race Card” Kenney, Minister of Citizenship and Immigration – Kenney has made a number of comments as an MP that have been criticized as racist and/or homophobic in nature. Arguably, this is not the sort of person you want setting immigration policy in a pluralistic and multicultural nation. When allegations were made that one of his party’s riding association executives was a member of a white supremacist Neo-Nazi organization, Kenny pondered “How do we know that and how do we know that this isn’t overheated Sikhs using the race card, which they so often do when their credentials are being questioned?”
• Steven “Supreme Executive Power” Fletcher, Minister of State (Democratic Reform) – During his time as President of the University of Manitoba Students’ Union, Fletcher was critized for undermining the editorial independence of the student newspaper and raiding the offices of progressive or left-leaning student groups such as the Graduate Students’ Association, the Womyn’s Centre, Amnesty International, the U of M Recycling Group, the Rainbow Pride Mosaic and the Manitoban. When he sought a Progressive Conservative nomination while still President of the Students’ Union, he was criticized for having a possible conflict of interest. He described those who questioned him as “left-wing extremists”.
• Jim “Don’t Invest in Ontario” Flaherty, Minister of Finance – Flaherty, who called Ontario “the last place” to invest at a time when its economy was already struggling, retains the Finance portfolio in which a big part of his job is to not undermine the economy. Bucking the trend of previous Ministers who sought to increase investment in Canada, Flaherty has adopted the reverse psychology approach to economic management.
• Gerry “Listeriosis-Related Deaths are Funny” Ritz, Minister of Agriculture and Agri-Food and Minister for the Canadian Wheat Board – I am a little bit stunned that Ritz is even in cabinet at all, never mind that he retained the Agriculture portfolio. In case you missed it, this is what the Minister said at the height of the listeriosis crisis: “This is like a death by a thousand cuts. Or should I say cold cuts.” When told that someone had died in PEI, Ritz quipped “Please tell me it’s [Liberal MP] Wayne Easter.”
• Peter “It Isn’t a Matter of National Security when the Minister of Foreign Affairs Loses Classified Documents to Someone Associated with Motorcycle Gangs” Van Loan, Minister of Public Safety – As Government House Leader, Van Loan repeatedly defended disgraced Foreign Affairs Minister Maxime Bernier who left classified documents in the possession of a person with significant ties to Québec motorcycle gangs. “This is not an issue of national security,” stated Van Loan, adding that “this government would not put national security at risk”. He will now be in charge of public safety.
• Conservative “Thirty-Eight Per Cent” Party of Canada, One Hundred Per Cent of the Federal Cabinet – Despite having the second weakest mandate of any government in Canadian history, the Conservative Party occupies every single cabinet post. This is not surprising, of course, since this is how every government (save the rare coalition) works. However, those of us who support new and more inclusive ways of doing politics would love to see a multi-partisan cabinet that is actually based on merit some day.

Now that you are sufficiently frightened, have a safe and happy Halloween tomorrow. And don’t forget to print out your Stephen Harper Mask (PDF) for the little ones.