A parody of the Nigerian e-mail frauds in reference to the Conservative Elections Scandal, Courtesy of Calgary Grit:

From: Conservative Headquarters
To: Conservative Candidates
Date: December 2, 2005
Subject: Urgent Request

Dearest Candidate,

Good morning, how are you and your family? I hope fine. Please, I am sorry to bother you with our problem.

Please know that it’s not by mistake I am contacting you but by the special grace of God. Let my start by introducing myself. I am writing from Stephen Harper’s Conservative Party with this urgent request from Party Headquarters.

Now is the time for all good men to come to our aid.

The Conservative Party has an extra ONE MILLION TWO HUNDRED THOUSAND DOLLARS in its bank account which is ordained to be used for TV advertising just before the January 23, 2006 election. But the Evil Chief Electoral Officer and his Satanic henchman, the Commissioner of Canada Elections, are watching us closely and are not permitting us to spend more than our puny $ 18.3 million limit.

Rules cannot be allowed to stop us from our destiny. Your campaign is identified as one which is not spending the limit. We will be switching our spending to your account by transferring $ 40,000 to your election bank account. But first you must give me a wire transfer form so that I can take the money out of your account as soon as it send you the money. I promise not to take more than I put in. Trust me.

After I use your bank account for this in and out transfer, you may claim 60% back from Elections Canada. This means you will get $ 24,000 and all you will have to do is let me use your bank account for one minute.

I assure you this is all legal. No one will suspect that this spending in not really for your campaign. And you can use the $ 24,000 anyway you wish.

Expecting your soonest response.

Stephen Harper Campaign Team
Conservative HQ, Ottawa*

*Dramatization of evidence use to obtain Criminal Code warrant to search Conservative Headquarters.
———–

Would you respond to this email? 67 CONSERVATIVE CANDIDATES IN THE 2006 ELECTION DID CLAIMING MORE THAN $ 750,000 IN TAXPAYER SUBSIDIES!

Help us bring real accountability to Canadian politics. We say, “if someone breaks the law, they should go to jail”. We mean it, whether it is a former Liberal who steals from the government or our party, or a Conservative trying to steal from you. Send your cheque to the Calgary Nosehill Liberals – Accountability Fund at 108, 5211 – MacLeod Trail SW, Calgary, Alberta T2H 0J3.

Maximum donation is $1,100 (less any other donation made to a Federal Liberal Association). Tax receipt will be issued.

h/t Raymond Reid of York University