Lawyer Fails to Buy Happiness, Reacts the Only Way a Lawyer Knows How

A lawyer in Manhattan is suing his dating service for failing to provide that special someone. John Friedland claims that he paid $10,000 for the services of Amy Laurent International (ALI), only to be set up with women who, according to his $100,000 claim, were already taken, weren’t “suitable” to his goals or wouldn’t consider “someone of plaintiff’s background”. (Because there’s no deal-breaker like finding out your date is a Manhattan lawyer willing to drop ten grand to meet you. Those of you studying for the New York bar exam over the next two months: take note.) ALI, the claim continues, “failed to perform even as good [sic] as a standard dating service”.1

Amy Laurent International bills itself as “a powerful personal headhunting agency for successful bachelors, individuals with demanding careers, and those with busy lifestyles that do not allow time for chance encounters with the right women they would consider for serious dating”. The service claims to headhunt attract eligible women “through high end social events and private parties and receives word of mouth referrals on a constant basis”. ALI contends that the company did all that was required of it, and that Mr. Friedland was himself responsible for dropping the ball on his dates.

Really? You’re telling us that a man who (a) would use an ultra-high-end “personal headhunting service” to find a mate, and (b) would then sue that headhunter for not hunting up sufficiently appealing heads, mightn’t be an irresistible charmer? There’s no hope for any of us.

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Law is Cool wishes Mr. Friedland all the best in his efforts to sue his way to conjugal bliss but cautions that proper grammar and syntax are a must when biting the hand that feeds you a bevy of potential mates. To paraphrase Tracy Jordan from 30 Rock, Superman does good. Dating services do well.

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